Archive for June, 2011

The Relationship Resuscitation Seminar

Author: iCoach

Jun 29

If you’ve read any of my blogs and/or my book you probably know enough about me that what I like to do is to provide you with a definition of a keyword in my article titles. The key word in this title is ‘Resuscitation’. Resuscitation is a verb, and it means to restore vigor, consciousness, or life to something. It also means, the act of reviving a person or, in this case, your relationships to health.

So why did I choose this subject and title for a seminar? I chose this as a subject because relationships are the key to our success in life. You’ve heard it before, “It’s not what you know, but who you know”.  So who you know and your relationship with them is the key. Of course, if you happen to be a monk living on a mountaintop somewhere in Tibet, contemplating life, your purpose, and to gain a deeper understanding of what we are experiencing then perhaps you don’t need so much of this information.

But, for the majority of us we are interacting with someone and usually many someone’s each and every day. Let’s face it, unless you understand how and can get along with your spouse or significant other, your boss, your children, your parents, your coworkers and every other living being on this planet you’re going to have a difficult time in your life, and you’re going to make life difficult for everyone else as well. So, if you understand this is true and you agree with what I just stated, then it’s time for you to completely understand your role in your life’s relationships. And I do mean every one of them!

I try to live my life by two mantras. The first one is by Gandhi, he said, “You must be the change you wish to see in the world”. The second quote is by Ben Franklin, who said, “A man convinced against his will is of the same opinion still”. The reason I find these quotes so powerful and related and why I quote Franklin and Gandhi all the time is this. What Gandhi means is that you can only change yourself. You cannot, as much as you may want to or as hard as you may try to, change someone else. And why I love Franklin’s quote so much is because it’s like finding the proper size glove for your hand. What I mean by that is this, if you and I were having a debate unless one of us was convinced that the other person was correct then neither of us would change our mind, would we. Thus, you cannot convince another person of something that they firmly believe is incorrect and consequently you cannot change them.

So you see, I hope, that getting along in a relationship is not about your rightness or your ability to talk louder than the next person, or your stomping your feet, or your huffing and puffing, or anything else you think you can do to shove your view down another person’s throat, so to speak. If you want things to change in any relationship you must be the one to change. Oh my God I can’t believe I have to do that. Is that what you’re saying to yourself right now? Well, I completely understand where you’re coming from, because you always need to be right, don’t you?

Perhaps you need to re-read my blog on, “Right or Peace”. Yes, I know, we all want to be right. God forbid we were wrong about something and have to admit it, we would probably fall apart. If you want peace and harmony in your life then you must allow others to be who they are, like it or not. So learn to like it! Again I reiterate Gandhi’s quote with a minor twist. Say this to yourself 10 times and don’t ever forget it. “I must be the change I wish to see in my world”. And finally, really and I mean really, listen to the other person, understand what they are saying whether you agree or not. Stop the tantrums, stop the yelling, stop making faces, stop looking up, and stop the exasperation. It is all in vain and will not get you any closer to having a better relationship with anyone or success and harmony in your life if you don’t get this.

Within the next few months I will be launching The Relationship Resuscitation Seminar. In the seminar will be a workbook with exercises and self-tests to help you reconnect with yourself. It will allow you to understand who you are and why you react the way you do, so you can alleviate and hopefully eliminate the stress in your life, and have harmony in all areas of your life. Those areas are of course your relationships and also your finances, your spirituality, your health and with your mind. It will be a way for you to truly understand that we are all connected and that it is only us who can save us from ourselves. Saving the planet is not just about conservation, recycling and climate change. It’s about saving ourselves from extinction, and it begins at home and at work.

I hope you will be looking forward to this as much as I am looking forward to completing the seminar.

Blessings and love to all

2 Comments
Filed under: Blog | Tagged as: , , ,

Making a Case for God – As if He/She Needs My Help

Author: iCoach

Jun 22

So why do we have such a difficult time believing that there is such an entity as God, or a higher power?  What is it about the proof that we need? And what kind of proof beyond what we are living in right now would make you believe that there is a God, if you don’t believe that now?

I know we look to science for proof about many things, but while science has brought us a lot of the physical things that we have in use today they can’t disprove that God exists. Even one of our greatest physicists, Stephen Hawking’s will admit that while he cannot prove that there is a God, he believes that all that exists today could have been created by design and not by chance.

In a way, none of us exist.  You see there are billions of people on this planet that have never heard of you or me and so in a way we don’t exist.  Just because we don’t see something does not mean it does not exist.  There is the age-old question of  “which came first, the chicken or the egg”?  Neither can exist without the other.  No chicken to create the egg, you cannot have a chicken.  No egg, and the chicken doesn’t exist.  So which way is it?  How did either of them get here?

With the hundreds, thousands, or millions of species of mammals, fish, birds, insects, vegetation and more on this planet is it easier to believe that they exist along with us without a creative mind or force, without a higher power having placed us here?  Why is it easier to not believe in God, and believe that we came from some primordial soup? And don’t even try to contemplate absolute nothingness and trying to figure out, which is what science is trying to do, where or how it all began because you will go insane.

But you still insist on PROOF!  Proof, what is it anyway?  Here is one definition: Sufficient evidence or argument for the truth of a proposition.  So, I propose there is a God.  Definition of Evidence: That which tends to determine or demonstrate the truth of a proposition.  So, what sort of evidence beyond what exists today do you need to see, hear, or feel to know that God exists? Perhaps a tap on your shoulder?  Again she is all around you, he is all around us and in us!

While I may applaud the scientific community for the many things that they have discovered and brought to us to have a better physical life, looking to science for empirical proof of the existence of God is futile, or is it? God either resides within you or she does not, and that is the beauty of this life, which has been given to us.

Just because your life isn’t as perfect as you would like it to be is no reason not to believe in the existence of God.  How is it that you were born knowing the difference between right and wrong?  How is it that you were born with the feeling of love and wonder for everything and everyone?  We were born perfect and are here to experience and enjoy all that this planet and nature offers us.  And it is the beauty of free will that makes us who we are, and it is a choice we make each and every moment, each and every day to add to the quality of our own life and to the lives of others.

Of course, believe as you wish because you have been given free will.  So scientifically speaking perhaps you will contemplate this last little bit of scientific information.  Science does say that everything is made up of atoms, quarks, or some other bit of material that they may discover, at a later date.  So if everything, that is every single thing, which exists, and that we see, feel and touch is made up of atoms then we truly are all connected.  So why would you want to hurt something you are connected to?  Would you cut of your arm because it hurt or would you try to heal the hurt?  We have choices and “Free will”.  So choose wisely and with fore thought and not just react to the hurt you may have experienced from another by eliminating them any more than you would remove your hurt arm.  While life may not be or seem perfect, you can strive for perfection, just as someone trains to win a race, you can train yourself to win at life.

My wish for me is that in every moment I act with love, kindness, and compassion.  My wish for you is that in every moment you act with love, kindness, and compassion.  Imagine if we all do this how magnificent of a life we will create for each other.

Blessings and love to all.

 

 

 

0 Comments
Filed under: Blog | Tagged as: , , , , , , ,

The World is Coming to an End

Author: iCoach

Jun 8

So do you think the world is coming to an end?  Well in a way it is.  The fact is this….  all the changes occurring right now on this planet are leading to a better life for all.  The movement has been happening for more than a decade and is now reaching its pinnacle.  And while it may not seem so according to news reports, because they don’t report, or know how to report about spirituality, that our wiring is to get back to basics.  What are those basics?  It’s those things that matter!  The real, true values of life and our existence, which are our families, our relationships, personal and in business, our politics, and our understanding of the world.

The realization that “We are One”.  Do you really get that?  We are one species who are made of the same stuff, want the same things, and have the same needs, which are food, shelter, and above all other things LOVE.  It is love, that incredible emotion that drives all of us.  And “No” I don’t mean the shallow love of a beautiful new car or home.  It is the love for another human being.  So stop worrying so much about all the little piddley stuff and get on with living joyously and give, share and be compassionate and loving.  When you do these simple things your whole life, our whole life on this planet changes.  It becomes a more beautiful place, physically and emotionally.  We come together so everyone has a beautiful life.

As my friend Cort Curtis wrote, “I would suggest that the world, everything that has ever occurred, every moment before this moment has come to an end… And so in this very moment, the fact that everything is in fact over, that everything has ended means that it is all just beginning… This is a new moment, a new day, a new world… Celebrate!”

Do not worry, therefore.  This is the Time, which has been predicted.  And only good will come of it.

4 Comments
Filed under: Blog | Tagged as: , , ,